Life is a journey

"You'll be on your way up! You'll be seeing great sights! You'll join the high fliers who soar to great heights. You won't lag behind because you'll have the speed. You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best. Wherever you go you will top all the rest.

Except when you don't. Because, sometimes, you won't.

I'm sorry to say so but, sadly, it's true that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you. You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You'll be left in a Lurch. You'll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump. And the chances are, then, that you'll be in a Slump. And when you're in a Slump, you're not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done." -Dr. Seuss

Sometimes (in fact more often than not, in my life) our lives take unexpected turns. My life has once again, taken an unexpected turn. "Oh the Places You'll Go" by Dr. Seuss has been my favorite book for as long as I can remember. I think it was written about me. You see, I am a planner. I like to have a plan. I like to think it through, plan it out and dream about it. But sometimes, I mess up and often ruin my own brilliant plans. So I have become especially good at planning for other people. I'm especially good about planning for my children. I have such high hopes and expectations for them. I know exactly what they need to do to have a happy life and be good people. I have thought about it, planned it out, and dreamed about it. I thought this is what a good mom does. But as I get older and my children get older, I am learning.

I am learning that they may have different dreams.

That they may have limititations that I forgot to include in my plan.

That they are not me.

I am learning that they are on their own journey. And that's okay.

As my children get older, I am learning that my role is no longer to lead them, but maybe just to walk gently beside them. And as much as I want to control their destiny so I can assure their happiness, this is not right. It's not about me anymore. As good as my intentions are, they need to walk their own path to find out what their happiness is. This is not an easy lesson to learn. I am doing homework every day. I want to shield my family from the harsh realities and sadness of this world. But if I do this, they will not be strengthened for the next trial that may come along when I cannot be there to protect. So I am trying to let go. I am trying to have faith-faith in them, faith in myself and faith in God. I am trying to let them find their own path to happiness and just loving them with every footstep. I have no problems with the loving part. It's the faith that scares me. But I continue to pray that I can love my children enough to let them go, to be themselves, to follow their own dreams.

Because life is a learning process, life is a journey...